So, I wrote this piece a few days ago and AVfM published it. It is about (among other things) how male sexuality is demonized/devalued. It is about how men need to learn self-respect and to value their selves in totality—including the importance of valuing their sexuality.
I wrote that men should stop giving away cock like it’s worthless. Perhaps if men valued their sexuality, they’d be less inclined to inundate women with emails, messages, and pick-up lines. Perhaps if men actually valued their sexuality, the ladies at Jezebel wouldn’t be so inclined to complain about all the free-cock oppression. Perhaps if men actually valued their sexuality, men wouldn’t degrade themselves by harassing, begging, and inundating women with dick pics and pleas for their attention and affection. Just sayin’…if men had self-respect, this wouldn’t happen. No self-respecting man is going to do such things.
It wasn’t a too terribly complicated message. In fact, it’s a rather boring message that I dressed up in some brutally honest words—my kind of “pit-bull savagery.” Learn to have self-respect. Don’t degrade yourself by begging women for their affection and attention. Don’t send women unsolicited dick pics. Don’t set yourself up for gobs of rejection and then complain that women don’t respect you.
Like I wrote, it’s not a too terribly complicated message. Hell, I don’t even think it’s controversial. What could be wrong with guys learning to respect themselves and value their sexuality?
Well, if you live in the Manboobz universe of David Futrelle, this message is pure misogyny. According to Boobz, men who have self-respect and value their sexuality—they are on a “cock strike” against “stuck-up ladies” who need to be taken “down a peg or two.” According to Manboobz, if men have enough self-respect to value their sexuality such that sometimes they may take the liberty of telling a woman no, these men are simply being “giant dicks.”
Telling a woman “no” is misogyny. Reminding a woman that no means no—that’s pure hatred of women because women should be entitled to all the free-cock they want from a man, even if the man isn’t interested in giving it to her. (Sounds like boobz may be a rape apologist?)
In reality, the dignity of a man has nothing to do with misogyny. If a man has enough self-respect to decline a woman’s sexual advances because she doesn’t meet his standards—that is not necessarily misogyny. It’s having standards…and there is nothing wrong with that. In fact, I think it is a good thing, but to Boobz, standards are misogyny…and for the casual reader of his blog, misogyny is the click-bait he uses to peddle his brand of rubbish and lies. It’s an excuse to extract money from women.
This is where the mocking of misogyny becomes misogyny. He doesn’t care about the women who bother to read his blog. Though he may have a few days in which he invites women and other commenters to share and cry about their troubles, any good pimp knows the importance of faking like he cares. Any good pimp knows how to manipulate the emotions of “his bitches.”
He preys on women who have legitimate concerns about misogyny, equality, sexism, and other cultural problems that affect all of us. When Boobz drafts a click-bait headline like the one below, he doesn’t care about why men are sending dick pics and bombarding women with emails and messages through online dating services. He’s not looking for solutions to these problems. He’s not saying that men who do such things may lack self-respect because the value of male sexuality is often viewed as less-than-worthless in our culture.
What he cares about is how to craft rubbish and lies, how to craft click-bait headlines to drive traffic to his site…and how to exploit the fears of women who donate to his site.
Exploiting women is a form of misogyny…and this exploitation of women’s fears and concerns about misogyny, equality, sexism and other cultural problems is Boobz’ source of income. In this way, Boobz has more in common with an abusive pimp than he has with any heroic slayer of misogyny. Boobz is the misogyny that he mocks. Boobz is a misogyny-pimp.
Aside from insisting that men should learn to value their selves in totality, I wrote about telling a woman that her soul was dog-shit. It was a line inspired by the dark comedy and Christmas classic—“Bad Santa.” I also wrote that men actually do handle rejection fairly well, considering how much rejection men actually endure. And so, I wrote about this hypothetical situation whereby the gobs of rejection typically endured by men was reversed, pointing out that women would typically become incredibly hostile about such rejection. Here is what I wrote:
Women typically feel entitled to free cock. Don’t believe me? Rejected girls are often the most vindictive, hateful, and slanderous cunts of thunder ever unleashed upon the world of men. Try telling a girl no. Tell her, after she makes it clear that she wants your cock, that you’re not interested in giving it to her. Tell her that she isn’t interesting, that her soul is dog-shit and that she has nothing to offer other than boobs and booty, that she is a piece of shit and a total failure as a human being, that you don’t find her attractive and that she isn’t even good enough to be a cum-bucket. Tell her that she is just a white girl with bird lips and that she is never going to be any good at sucking cock and that she needs to stop pretending that she is doing any favors and learn to compensate for her inadequacies by becoming “kinky.” Tell her that her vapid life of shoes and pop-culture and materialism are soulless pursuits of dog-shit. Watch what happens. If you Jez-ladies wanna know what “hostile” means, see this rejected woman.
I never encouraged anybody to treat another person in this way. (And I never would encourage that kind of abusive behavior.) It’s vicious on purpose—to illustrate the callousness with which men are routinely rejected. It illustrates the depths of degradation that some men are willing to endure for the chance of getting affection, attention, and sex from a woman. I actually encouraged folks to consider how some women *might* react to being treated this way. Nobody was actually rejected. Nobody was actually told that her soul was dog-shit.
However, women in Boobz’ comment threads were actually hostile about this hypothetical rejection. Boobz emotionally manipulated readers of his blog (effectively treating them like a pimp does “his bitches”) with his click-bait headline and blatant lies. These hostile women were proxy to the rejection of a woman that never actually happened…and they didn’t handle it very well. In fact, there is a lot of hostility in his comment threads—anecdotally proving another one of my points.
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned…or the fury of women who were fake-scorned.