The Wife Is Not Your Friend

bill-cosby (Small)

Here is an excellent video about male emotional dependence and retardation. Men/boys are conditioned to believe that a wife is to be man’s closest friend but in reality, a wife is no such thing—rarely ever even close. When a man depends on his wife for friendship, it opens the man to emotional manipulation and exploitation. His emotional development retards and his relationships with other men becomes shallow and relatively meaningless talk about sports or some other fetishistic activity that deflects away from meaningful talk.

I talked with a man the other day who had labored for more than 30 years at the same job. I asked him how much longer until retirement. He wasn’t sure, but his wife…his “best friend,” chimed in immediately. She had the date coldly calculated to the month—knowing exactly how long his income would last. The wife kept better tabs on the husband’s career and money than the husband because she isn’t his friend. She doesn’t “love” him as a friend or human-being. She loves his function as a tool to provide for her—to satiate her greedy-pig lifestyle.

I considered talking to him about how he could have retired years ago, if not for his greedy-pig wife, but he believes that he would be helpless without her. And this is probably true to an extent, because without her, he would be emotionally crippled. Without her telling him who to be, he would suddenly find himself empty, in an emotional vacuum of loneliness, and face-to-face with the reality of his underdeveloped self—a self that exists only in relation to and dependent upon the dictates of his wife.

She would have it no other way. She would never dare look at her husband as a person, lest she face the reality of her exploitations of him. She needs him to be emotionally crippled and dependent upon her, for if he were to ever develop a self—independent from her, she would no longer be able to enjoy the fruits of his labors. As the host should never become aware of the parasite, the husband should never become aware of his exploitation…and as a parasite has little concern for the health of its host, so the wife has little concern for the emotional well-being of her husband. So long as he remains obedient and shows up every day for work, so long as he suffers in silence (or better yet, believes he isn’t suffering) the parasite remains content—calculating coldly the days until he is used up and time to be retired.

The wife is not your friend. No friend is going to make a friendship contingent upon a diamond ring or other sorts of trinkets to be placed on fingers or shelves. A friend doesn’t treat you as a tool or as an object-of-utility to be thrown away if broken. A friend actually cares about your emotional well-being as a human-being. Any woman who demands rings and other trinkets for the continuation of the friendship—she is not your friend.

Bill Cosby’s latest performance is a 90 minute set dedicated to this distinction between “the friend” and “the wife.” At 76 years of age, he still has the comic genius and the skills to reiterate, in a hilarious way, that his wife is not his friend. Men need to understand this. Men need to actually *listen* to their so-called friend. The Cos warns men that actually listening will reveal that she doesn’t give a damn about you. She gives a damn about what you do for her. Pay attention and listen. Hear what she actually says. A friend doesn’t demand rings and trinkets in exchange for friendship.

The wife is not your friend.

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