Asshat trips and ruins X-Files

 Asshat ruins X-Files

Women’s fashion is a subtle form of bondage. It’s men’s way of binding them. We put them in these tight, high-heeled shoes, we make them wear these tight clothes and we say they look sexy. But they’re actually tied up. –David Asshat Douchecovny

I usually don’t give a fuck about the dumb shit that oozes out the mouths of asshat celebrities, but this vomit needs cleaned.

It’s not typically men who buy all the imbecilic fashion magazines and it’s not men who typically obsess about shoes. I couldn’t (and neither do most men) give a fuck about such things. It wasn’t typically men who watched (or gave any fucks whatsoever about) that vapid show describing the entrails of women who live in the city—“Sex and the City.” And neither is it typically men who buy and read the “50 Shades” trilogy that infantilizes women and is literally about binding women.

By Douchecovny’s vomit-logic, I suppose it is the fault of men for shoving down the throats of obese women a diet of Big Macs and junk food. By this vomit-logic, these poor and helpless women are at the mercy of and bound to men’s influence on the fashion industry. As such, men are to blame for women who suffer with all sorts of eating disorders because men rule the fashion industry. Clearly, this must be true because men give so many fucks about fashion.

The fashion industry is a way for masochistic women to bind themselves. If women want to spank themselves by wearing the latest imbecilic fashions and shoes, don’t blame men. It’s women’s own vapid and materialistic behavior. Nobody, especially men, “forces” that on them. All I (and most men) ask of women is that they get their fat asses on a fucking treadmill a few times per week and to exercise some self-control over their fucking carbohydrate intake. Nothing about that entails imbecilic fashion or ridiculous shoes or absurdist expectations about beauty. The expectation is that women be humans, moral agents in charge of making their own decisions about their health, diet, and physical fitness.

Men, on the other hand, are expected to not only do all the fucking cardio, but they are also expected to do all the fucking anaerobic weight-lifting to build mass and look like a physically useful G.I.Joe/human-tool. On top of that, men also are well expected to regulate their diet and look ripped with no fashion at all—just their shirtless fucking chest protruding out from their human-body-tool, being a symbol of their alpha-male virility and utility. “Yeah, I’m your man ‘cause I can lift heavy shit for you and ‘cause I can beat up other beta-males, baby.”

It doesn’t end there. Oh fucking no. Men are also expected to earn a living and have a well-developed mind—a mind that is marked with a fucking science degree that earns him at least 6 figures of income. Even more, that income is expected to bring security to a wife and kids because that income is expected to be rendered to a wife and kids—without which, he is not really a man, probably just a loser or a homo or a child-man who refuses to “grow-up.”

Who is “bound,” you fucking asshat?

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